When you want to make a positive change in your life, there are two ways of going about it. You can tell yourself “I’ll try” or you can tell yourself “I will do it”.

“I’ll try” is a half-hearted attempt at your goal. It carries within it self-doubt and self-protection. The fire of desire—fuel of all life and action—rises sharply inside you, saying “I must do this. I want this. This is important”. And you dim its light by saying, “Okay, I’ll try”.

In that lukewarm commitment you are admitting powerlessness. “Hey, I’ll give it my best, but this is not fully under my control.” Yes, that’s true—the reality of life is that most things are not fully under your control, but holding on to this fact can very easily become a subtle excuse for not stretching ourselves beyond our comfort zone.

Sometimes it’s not enough to do your best; you have to do what it takes.

— Winston Churchill

Imagine if he had instead said, “I’ll try to win the war.” That would have robbed the soldiers of their spirit, confidence, and optimism—all powerful ingredients for victory. It would have robbed millions of citizens of hope.

This concept applies to any war we may be fighting—internal or external.

The next level up from “I’ll try” is “I’ll do it”, which is a resolution. I’ll try is, at best, a 99% effort; “I’ll do it” is 100%. And that missing one percent makes the whole difference.

When you try and it doesn’t work, you may tell yourself, resignedly, “Well, I’ve tried 🤷🏼” and leave it at that. Game over.

When you commit and it doesn’t work, the next thought is naturally, “Okay, what else do I need to do?” This question leads to motivation, commitment, perseverance.

Tapping into “I will” generates much more energy for you to achieve your goal. But there are no guarantees that you will succeed right away. You may still fail, initially, and then the fall will be bigger than if you had just committed to trying.

So, in order to use “I will” effectively, it’s important that you know how to navigate failure without guilt-tripping yourself, and without connecting failure to your self-image or letting it traumatize you. If you can do that, then the wholehearted commitment of “I will” is the quickest path to achieving your goals.

You may now be internally convinced of the power of “I will”, but still not feel ready to embrace it. Let’s unpack why this might be the case.

The Obstacle of Self-Doubt

When you say “I’ll try”, what you are also saying is “I don’t know if I can”. This honest admission, albeit always truthful, is rarely helpful.

In contrast, “I will do it” may be a false certainty—there are no guarantees in life. But it’s this certainty that pushes us to look deeper into ourselves, to find resources within and without that we didn’t dream existed.

“I’ll try” is the self-consolation of the doubtful.

“I’ll do it” is the spark of the visionary.

Sure, there are many things in life you can’t fully control.

• Overcoming a particular disease
• Producing social change in your community
• Making your marriage work
• Achieving enlightenment

In these and many other goals, big or small, there will always be factors outside your control.

So what do we do? Realizing that these factors exist, we may mentally bow our heads to them as if they were a higher power and say, “I’ll try”. In these cases, committing 100% to the change we want to make may feel too emotionally risky—“What if I commit like that and then fail? What if I do my best and it still isn’t enough?”

That is the voice of fear, which is at the root of much of our self-doubt.

If we give our very best and still don’t succeed, so what? We get back up, with renewed commitment and determination. Instead of wasting time in guilt trips, let us simply make a new resolution, as if no failure ever happened.

I’d rather fail after giving my best than live in the regret of “What if I had done more… What if I had also put in that missing 1%…” When we are able to dissociate failure from our sense of self-worth, then we are emotionally freed. Then we are able to commit fully, and renew that commitment as many times as needed.

Yet, for many, there is still another obstacle.

The Obstacle of Inertia

The default attitude for most of us is “I’ll try”—because it is a smaller commitment. It definitely feels easier than making a full resolution; it takes less energy, less focus, and less intensity. We can say “I’ll try” anytime, to anything, and that’s why it becomes meaningless.

“I’ll try” feels like jogging a lap at an easy pace; “I’ll do it no matter what” is like committing to running that lap as fast as you can. So it’s natural that we experience hesitancy or unwillingness about this more intense commitment. Our brain is inherently lazy; it wants to save energy, because its primary mission is survival.

However, in the long run, “I’ll try” takes much more energy, and is more painful. Because with “I’ll try” you will face many obstacles. You will procrastinate, get distracted, tell yourself excuses, doubt yourself, and give up from time to time. You will have many false starts, and experience much more decision fatigue, self-control conflicts, and cognitive effort than if you had just made one non-negotiable decision.

If you tell yourself “this week I’ll try to use social media less”, you are in for trouble. With that mindset you will experience temptation multiple times a day. You’ll need to go through inner dialogues to decide if now is a good exception or not, and how much you should allow yourself. Then comes the energy of monitoring how much you are using, and the willpower to force yourself to stop—even though you want to continue. Not to mention the emotional energy wasted if guilt and self-disappointment surge up.

It’s a lot of work!

Compare that to making one truly non-negotiable decision: “I will not use social media this week, come what may.” That uncompromising rule gives you absolute clarity. It saves a lot of mental energy. When such a decision is firm within you, you actually experience fewer temptations, because something inside of you is fixed, unmovable. That feels powerful.

Many people who have completely quit alcohol or smoking, after many unsuccessful attempts, know the power of a true resolution. The moment they made an absolute commitment, temptations began to disappear, inner self-control conflicts became obsolete, and their mind and will were freed to focus on bigger things.

The amount of mental and emotional energy you spend in the moment you make a resolution is great; but from that point onward the path is much easier, simpler, clearer. Conversely, the amount of energy you spend when you start with “I’ll try” is much less, close to nothing, but the path ahead will be full of challenges and inner conflict, demanding much energy.

“I’ll try” is cheap—but ends up costing you much more in the long run.

“I’ll do it” is a big up-front investment—yet it gets the job done, more quickly and more effectively.

A Caveat

“I’ll try” is easy and comfortable. It requires little effort, no commitment, and doesn’t necessarily ask you to stretch your self-belief. “I’ll do it” asks much more of you, but gives you a powerful shortcut.

Having said that, “I’ll try” can at times be a valid way forward—especially for getting some momentum in the beginning. Having an experimental mindset is a good way to get started with something, especially when we might have fear of failure or low sense of self-efficacy about that activity.

So I’m not here to criticize that approach. In fact, I’ve covered the idea of baby steps and the importance of setting small achievable goals in my books.

The purpose of this article is simply to highlight the power of full commitment. In my years of experience as a teacher, writer, and coach, the power of a true resolution is something that very few people understand. And when we are talking about big changes, or difficult goals, this is the most powerful approach.

It’s Your Turn

Think of a change you want to make in yourself, or in your life. Something you’ve attempted many times, without success. Will you keep telling yourself, “I’ll try”, or will you gather your energy, your emotion, your will, and say “I’ll do it”?

When we think “I’ll try”, we don’t always go the extra mile. In the best case scenario, we go to the extra mile we can see. But when we decide “I’ll do it”, we go the extra mile we can’t see—the one that is beyond, the one that we are unaware of, the one that reveals itself in the process. We touch our deepest potential.

May this article kindle your inner fire! May it inspire you to do what it takes, so you can win your war.